This is a series of 7 Articles from my book, Calling Forth Greatness. I hope you enjoy these Coaching Wisdoms and that you will use them to transform your life.
Coaching Wisdom One
Connect Heart to Heart
I have little doubt that the heart is the major energy center of my body and a conveyor of a code that represents my Soul.” ~ Paul Pearsall, PhD
It is time we start appreciating the power of the heart and begin to recognize it as the true wisdom center of our mind-body-spirit humanity.
Coaches establish trust and rapport with clients by showing genuine care and concern for their client’s welfare. They create a safe, supportive environment by demonstrating personal integrity, honesty, and respect for client’s perceptions, learning style, and personal being. When I center myself in this heart-based mindset, I find it easier to suspend my judgments, which is critical for sustaining a safe environment for my clients to “do their personal work.”
According to scientific research and personal experiences, Paul Pearsall, PhD, psychoneuroimmunologist, demonstrates in his book The Heart’s Code, page 4, that the human heart, not the brain, holds the secrets that link body, mind, and spirit. “…Research suggests that the heart thinks, cells remember, and that both of these processes are related to an as yet mysterious, extremely powerful, but very subtle energy with properties unlike any other known force…this heart’s code is recorded and remembered in every cell in the body as an informational template of the soul, constantly resonating within and from us, sent forth from our heart.”
- Establish a connection of safety, trust, and caring.
- Connecting heart-to-heart is not just something they do. It is how they are being. Coaches center and connect with their heart; bring their awareness to the present moment and to the presence of the heart of the other person; allow themselves to be receptive and open; clear their mind of limiting thoughts, beliefs, or concerns; suspend their judgments and release their attachments. This creates a sacred space.
- Focus attention on the other person.
- Intend to connect on a heart level. Coaches tune into the energy connection between them and their clients; listen deeply to the other person; demonstrate caring with empathy and compassion; commit to supporting their client’s clarity and freedom to make more empowering choices.
- Listen for what the other person is attracted to.
- Coaches listen for the client’s values—what they would value if they could have what they want, what lights up their heart, or what their heart wants. Coaches reflect what they see or feel from their client’s expressions and then check in for clarification and validation. For example: “I notice your eyes lit up when you spoke about your passion for dancing. Is that what your heart wants?”
When we make caring connections, we build more meaningful personal and business relationships. The power of the heart creates safety, trust, and openness. It clears obstacles, expands possibilities, and supports others close to us in our families and work environments in being at choice and empowers them to move toward what “lights them up.”
The key to connecting heart-to-heart is being authentically caring. Caring is not just another emotion; it is fundamental to most other emotions. For example, you aren’t angry or sad unless you care about something that has been lost or damaged. We care because we have wants and needs. Care also has to do with action. We take care to be accurate; we take care to get the outcomes we want. We take care of others—patients, clients, children, parents, etc. Caring can be the link between our emotions and our actions.
Calling Forth Greatness Inquiry: How do I create caring, heart-to-heart connections?
Reflect on this Calling Forth Greatness Inquiry for a day or a week. Notice what shows up. Journal your learning.
Watch here for future Wisdoms:
Wisdom #3 – Aim for the Goal/Embrace the Process
Wisdom #4 – Speak Empowering Language
Wisdom #5 – Be Committed to Transformation
Wisdom #6 – Call Forth Greatness
Wisdom #7 – Hold Them BIG