This is a series of 7 Articles from my book, Calling Forth Greatness. I hope you enjoy these Coaching Wisdoms and that you will use them to transform your life.
Coaching Wisdom Three
Aim for Goal/Embrace Process
“In the measurement world, we set a goal and strive to achieve it. In the universe of possibility, we set the context and let life unfold.” – Benjamin Zander
Coaches recognize there is more energy and aliveness available in the process of moving toward a goal than in the result itself. Clients experience more success, satisfaction, and fulfillment as they embrace the quality of their journey – even with its ups and downs and twists and turns.
The paradox is you can’t have a process without setting a goal.
Coaches support clients in embracing these success factors for a quality journey:
- Be clear and focused on what you really want, and pay no attention to what you don’t want.
- Be committed to achieving the goal. That sets up creative tension that will pull you forward.
- Head and heart partnership. Allow each to do what it does best: The heart notices what wants to change, and the head provides the direction and actions for manifesting that desire.
- Let go of any attachment to the form of the result, so you don’t limit the possibilities.
- Appreciate your learning and self-discovery. Hold learning as your value, versus judging any perceived mistakes, breakdowns or failures.
- Be open to the unexpected (the miracles) along your path. Welcome what shows up, evaluate for learning and revise your plan based on your self-discovery, step by step. The path may be circuitous, but the result will be richer and more satisfying in the end.
“You have to accept whatever comes and the only important thing is that you meet it with the best you have to give.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
Going for the goal…
My client Barry wanted to make a million dollars in his first year at mortgage lending. Suspending my judgment, and believe me I had one, in the spirit of partnership, I said, “OK, let’s go for it!” In truth, I had no way of knowing what Barry was capable of. In the process of going for that goal, Barry could call himself forth powerfully, leverage his innate strengths, learn new skills, and build new practices for success. At the end of that first year, he could possibly blow right by that million and weigh in at 1.5 million.
The other possibility was that he could be stopped or slowed down by his own limiting beliefs, mental patterns, or emotional blocks. Another possibility is that circumstances beyond his control (global economy, family crisis, natural disaster, etc.) could get in the way or derail him. Thus his final result could have been less than a million.
What I knew for sure, was that his passion for his goal, his accountability to himself, and his learning process could absolutely transform who he is being and who he is becoming in life – beyond mortgage lending.
Inquiry: Who am I being as I aim for my goal and embrace my process?
Reflect on this inquiry for a day or a week. Notice what shows up. Journal your learning.
“Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul.
Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.”
– Pamela Vault Starr
“The road to your dreams
Can only be found
With one foot in eternity
And the other on shaky ground.”
– Rick Tourquinio
Wisdom #1 – Connect Heart to Heart
Wisdom #2 – Make Empowering Choices
Wisdom #4 – Speak Empowering Language
Wisdom #5 – Be Committed to Transformation
Wisdom #6 – Call Forth Greatness
Wisdom #7 – Hold Them BIG